In particular, my main client – who provides me with a steady half-time income – is such a blessing! My colleagues are wonderful, making the long commute to the office worthwhile. We wear shorts and t-shirts, play with dogs in the office, and have excellent coffee (and a microwave, unlike my last office)!
This client has taken me away from home for four nights this week, the first time I’ve been away from Baby E overnight. I think it’s been rougher for him and Papa D than for me. The only concession I have had to make is pumping two to three times a day.
My main concern is how this separation will affect our nursing relationship. My fear, of course, is that E will wean himself in my absence. I feel that would be such a shame, because we are having a lovely time right now. After so much stress and anxiety about building my milk supply, it’s so nice to have abandoned the bottles and let go of the fistfuls of pills taken each day and stop worrying about clocking my nursing sessions and the time between them. The biggest change is that I am no longer having to pump!!
Nowadays, I simply have enough milk for all of E’s needs. Whenever he wants to nurse, we nurse, for as long as he wants to. I’m not pushing him to nurse or pushing him to wean. I’m just enjoying this lovely interlude – between the challenging first year of nursing and the day when he weans.
On Monday morning, E’s morning nursing seemed different. He lay tucked under my arm, with my nipple in his mouth, not sucking voraciously as he usually does. Instead, he was wide-eyed and calm. I realized that this could be the last time he ever nurses.
I would be sad if he weans during this week, but I won’t be devastated. I’ve had a rewarding 14 and a half months. I achieved my goal of nursing for a year, and every day past that has been a special blessing. Especially when you consider that adoptive breastfeeding is a (medical) miracle in the first place.
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